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| Under Dad's house after we had cleaned up some.... |
Looking back, I can understand how my father must have felt when I tried to clean up at his house. I used to try and throw things out that he wouldn't miss or that were a fire hazard and we would have arguments. I eventually did some reading and I got a better understanding of what he was going through (and realised I was collecting things too - it just wasn't piles of newspapers). I didn't understand how much it hurt him for me to throw out his old newspapers and boxes, until I read about hoarding.
People with hoarding tendencies are emotionally attached to their stuff - like it's their children or their memories. They need to make the decision themselves to get rid of it and that in turn helps to change the way they think.
I was always confused by my father being such a logical man and yet unable to throw out things that I saw no value in, but also paradoxically confused years before by my mother not understanding that I had to keep all MY stuff throughout my childhood. After her death and after I had moved out, Dad kept everything in my room as it was and even added things he thought I would like. Later he started storing other things in there and I had to stand my ground and make it my space since I came to stay once a year. My sister's bedroom was covered in car parts.
These days I'm trying to be a bit more like my mother.
